Did you ever hear the cries of a blue jay?
It sounds like a drunken Tinkerbell screaming for her life.
I’m starting out with that because that’s apparently how I’ll be starting out this morning. On a goddamn Saturday morning no less.
You see in my mind, if I wasn’t so lazy, I already went to the garage, broke down my car, somehow fashioned myself a military grade flame thrower, and burned the whole tree down while laughing maniacally as I watched the blue jay make its last few drunken screams.
Suffering as I did.
But I remind myself, goosefraba. Goooooooooooooooooosefraba. Find my center.
It is a lazy Saturday, after all. A blissful, restful, and maybe even a delightfully sinful day was waiting for me just outside those bedroom doors. Limitless possibilities.
Of course, I’m going to park myself on the couch and play video games.
Maybe even order Pizza later because screw cookin’.
I’m going to enjoy this day all for myself, anyway I want it, however I want it, for however long I want it until the clock strikes midnight.
No one will bother me this day I think to myself as I grab a water bottle out of the fridge.
I don’t care, Mormons! I say as I ignore the doorbell and turn on my game system.
I don’t care! Girl Scouts! I’m going to punch some scrubs online! I say as I ignore the doorbell once again and pick up my joystick.
Bang-bang. They’re knocking–smacking–on the door.
Did… Did I pay my bills?
BANG-BANG. I’m pretty sure those are kicks.
When was the last time I did something to piss off the Yakuzas?
“Goddamn it! Open up! I know you’re in there!” She yells.
Emily. Emily Wolf.
I begrudgingly drag my body over and open the door. Soon as she heard the lock click, she barges in with that wide grin of hers.
“What up, nerd! It’s a beautiful day and you’re going to spend it cooped up in your room again?!”
I peek outside and it’s cloudy. It’ll probably rain soon.
“I didn’t know you were coming over today,” I say.
“Yeah, hope you don’t mind but Noah was taking care of some stuff and I was bored,” Emily says as she holds up a big bag she’s carrying. “I brought chicken though!”
Any complaint I have disappears with the smell of the chicken. I’m probably smiling already without realizing.
By the time I come to my senses, I’m by my kitchen counter opening up the bag and checking out my loots.
“Were you getting your butt kicked?” She asks as she fiddles around with my joy stick. “You always get your butt kicked. You were getting your butt kicked.”
She makes a whipping noise.
“I didn’t even get to play yet.” She got the extra crispy kind. Emily doesn’t like the extra crispy kind. I like the extra crispy kind.
I grab a couple of plates and dump some chicken, cob of corn and macaroni and cheese that came as the package for the two of us.
From afar it sounded like she was just smashing the buttons and the stick but by the time I set the plates on the table in front of the couch I’m surprised to find that she’s winning.
“Hell, yeah!” She screams as she secures the win. “I like this game. I should buy this game.”
“You don’t even have the console,” I take a big bite into the chicken.
Without looking down she grabs hers and does the same.
I always saw Emily with a sense of envy. She was that type of person that seemed to be so carefree but be so damn talented at everything.
It’s petty but I see her playing this game I’ve played since college. I know if she had wanted to, she could be better than I ever could be in a few months.
But, even then, I always enjoyed her compa…
“Why you just sitting there in silence, ya freak?” Emily asks as she sees me trailing off in my thoughts.
…ny. But today… or any other day soon I didn’t really want to see her.
“Kay, you’re starting to freak me out now,” Emily starts another match and hurriedly gobbles down glops of macaroni and cheese before it begins.
Because decisions were made and I had news I didn’t want to share with her. Something I wasn’t sure if it was either appropriate or inappropriate for me to share.
“Watch me make this kid cry,” she said with devilish grin. “Children’s tears are the fuel to my life source.”
I believe it.
“Emi…” I clear my throat to make it unnecessarily dramatic. “Emily.”
“I already have a boyfriend I love from the bottom of my heart, Mr. Writer,” Emily cuts me off.
“God damn, it.” I shut up and just watch her finish the match.
“What is it?” She sets the joystick down and looks at me.
“I think…” I pause again and make the mistake of making it unnecessarily dramatic once more. “I think need to tell you something.”
“Am I pregnant?”
“Are you pregnant?”
“Is Noah pregnant?”
“Just…” I let out a deep sigh.
“…What is it?” She’s serious now.
“Someone’s going to die,” I tell her. Great date.
Emily grin’s gone and she looks at me like she’s about to punch me. She scratches her fake blonde hair and lets out a sigh.
“What are you talking about?” She’s agitated.
I try to grab the chicken and she looks at me as if I’m committing a murder dodging her question.
“Hey!” She raises her voice. “I’m talking to you! Who’s going to die?!”
I’m a coward. I’m an asshole. Why did I say anything?
“Choke on it,” Emily tells me as she gets up and fixes her bomber jacket. She rushes over to the front door and I instinctively go after her against my better senses.
She grabs the door handle and pauses for a moment.
“Do what you got to do,” Emily says. “Just do what you got to do.”
I can’t give her a reply but she knows what it’d be.
She walked out into the rain as I wonder if she regretted taking the time out of her life to visit someone like me.
But I know such a thought would offend her.
Emily Wolf regrets nothing.
This is a personal writing exercise that I’ve been asked by my editor and few others to share on this blog.
To get to know my characters better I go on a “date” with them to explore their thoughts, reactions, and just overall dimensions of what makes them a person.
Sometimes it goes well and sometimes it goes terribly. I’ll try to post a few more that I’ve done in the future.
The new edits are done for Black Halo: the Witch & the Guardian and it should be live by 1 PM PST 5/11/205!
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